Methane Minder T-Shirts

'If they don't care about the deforestation, then I don't care about the methane gas.'

"I keep telling myself I've got to slow down."

'Mr. Dunbarter, your fantasy that 'greed is good' may be a case of economic insanity.'

"I advised a patient to take responsibilty for his own actions, and now he is suing me!"

'Would you feel less inferior if I made you a Colonel?'

'It's a sad case -- amnesia AND identity theft.'

"Don't worry they're all part of my team."

"We'll soon have you sorted out, Mr. Fenton."

'I've lost the urge to repeat everything...'

Well, I feel a lot better - he says there's a method to my madness.

Yes, yes, let your aggressions out, but not here!

"Well, how can I help cure your severe hypochondria if you keep cancelling appointments due to illness?"

Analyst and patient

Doctor with pump: 'Hold on a second while I inflate his ego.'

"I don't know why I'm here - I don't need a haircut."

"I'm sorry, sir, but we're not MAGICIANS!"

'I'm going to refer you to Dr. Keinsorge -- he actually enjoys this sort of thing.'

It's always the same dream. I'm in therapy, analyzing my recurring dream.

'No more appointments today, Miss Mitchell. I'm all psyched out.'

When psychiatrists do self analysis.

When psychiatry works too well!

Impressive! (Cow has stinky smoke signals).

"Let it out. Let it all out."

"Therapist: Six couches no waiting"

'I'm trying to work on Mr. Findlay's self-esteem, Miss Oglethorpe — stop giggling in there!'

"He thinks he's invented a fluted, or grooved, top for pill bottles so that he can tip out a single pill rather than have a cascade of them rolling about on the kitchen or bathroom floor."

"Well, right now I'm feeling a little uncomfortable."

'It all started in my previous life, doctor.'

'WOOHOO! I love Methane!'

'You think you have a hard life? -- I have to listen to crazy people every day!'

'There's nothing physically wrong. It needs a psychiatrist.'