Messy Play Lovers Gifts

'I don't know why you use the lid to this thing. It's so much more fun without it!'

'No. The television screen hasn't gone red - You've got tomato ketchup all over your glasses!'

'Because of the mess, 'Mr. Potato Salad-Head' never took off.'

Playing pig

Impractical Guide to Having Babies: I need backup...NOW!

"I fell in the mud again. Maybe I need a stunt double."

'Peekaboo!'

Newborn Chaos

"Once I have the motor skills, I'll be knee deep in pudding every. Damn. Day."

'The sleepover was great Mum: Timmy's house is a pigsty just like ours...'

Boyfriend scores notches on wall by bed.

Call it Tough Love.

Little boy dragon

'No, we are not going on an extreme picnic.'

Ball pit

'How do I know your ours?'

'I envisioned something more robust'

"I've been interfacing with mud."

'You're honoured, Mr. Coombes - He won't do that for just anyone!'

Valentine's Day calls for a romantic candlelight dinner and soft music. Then a trip back to my place for some heavy groping and groaning.

"Trust me, boss, he knows his pies...he just needs more retraining."

'You have to clean it yourself. There is no delete key.'

"My decorating style is more like 'Flung Shui'."

'Previously on 'Mummies and Daddies...''

'We were mud wrestling.'

Candles In Bed

Intramission

'Don't worry about a thing, my Mom doesn't believe in spanking.'

'And that one is the mistake I made in Act II, Scene III, line 14 of Hamlet.'

"Your three minutes are up — it's Daddy's turn!"

Waiting for Godot - waiting room.

The Garrick Theatre

'I am transferring to another day-care center. I am not getting enough playing time.'

"Honey, did you call for a free estimate on a 3 bedroom, 2 bath tree house?"

'Thomas won't stay off the stage. He loves his part in the school play - he's the commercial.'