Merry Maker Pillows

'Eat in moderation. Drink in moderation. Be merry all you want.'

'Well, gotta get up early and start drinking again.'

"Don't worry dear. I won't spoil her anymore than you can afford."

It's our editorial opinion that you DESERVE a very Merry Christmas.

"There's no need to be em'bear'rassed about what you like!"

'I'd like to tell you all about it, dear, but what happens in Joe's Bar STAYS in Joe's Bar.'

You need a sense of humor to work here, but you're overqualified.

"We all go a bit crackers over Christmas, just try to pull yourself together."

"You're making a complete ass of yourself, Rodney!"

'Not beans on toast again.' - 'No, toast on beans. I dropped it.'

'Ringing in your ears, you say?'

Working at a brewery.

Angelicus alcholicus.

Be careful how you unwrap it I think it MIGHT be his stool sample!

'One thing about beer -- you never get buyer's remorse.'

"Looks like we left out the wrong brownies."

Merry Christmas!

'I'm sorry, I laughed when I saw you in spite of myself!'

Prosecco and Pudding

"I told you, no "funny business," Anderson."

'Yeah... and I'm the tooth-fairy!'

Drunk Golfer.

'Gold!! You bought Gold!! What about our agreed upon gift price limit?'

Cats pull a Christmas cracker and find a mouse inside.

"Santa, sorry for the soy milk and vegan fig bars - Caleb."

'Uh ho. I wouldn't venture outside on the 24th December if I were you.'

The Rake's Progress - Tavern Scene.

Man leaving the tavern and realising he is late for dinner

"Naughty or nice? I thought in a post-fact world, anything goes?"

"So where's the baby cheeses we heard so much about?"

Merry and Bright!

'If the Lord knows each time a sparrow falls to earth, it seems like a Minister of the Gospel could at least remember to mail a few Christmas cards.'

"Yeah of course I told them I was bringing you, why?"

'I know this is Christmas and all, but you should never let them watch 'The Great Escape'!'