Merger Or Acquisition Gifts

'We divested ourselves of a division here, a subsidiary there, a branch here, an affiliate there...there's nothing left!'

'This time we're going to do things right. And if that doesn't work, we'll just go back to stealing.'

A fight in the Boardroom.

'And I'm happy to say, that since the merger...'

"Well, it looks like the merger is off."

'They sold the company in 2001? I was wondering why things were slow.'

Voice coming from wooden horse: 'Quiet Fanshaw! If this hostile take-over bid is going to work we've got to get right inside the boardroom.'

"It's Swamp & Swallow - they're making an offer we can't refuse!"

'We've just become the biggest corporation in America.. let's celebrate today and begin downsizing tomorrow.'

"What's wrong with swallowing up other companies?"

"I see we're going up against the Big Guys."

"We structured the deal so it won't make any sense to you."

'To close the deal, I had to make some minor concessions.'

'If we have only fractional ownership, it's not a private jet anymore, is it?'

'He's ruthless and greedy... so let's make sure he's on our side.'

"That's Hicks from the corporate office. He's adorable, but trust me—when it comes to acquisitions, he's an animal!"

Takeovers.

'Uh - oh... this looks like an unfriendly takeover!'

Fish and color

"Now this chart should clear up any confusion you have with the report."

'We have what might be a very good idea...'

'Make them a four billion dollar takeover offer, but don't cause a fuss.'

"Cheer up, if this carries on we could become a very attractive takeover target.

"Oh, no! We've inadvertently gobbled up our own parent company."

'I'm feeling absolutely marvelous. I think I'll acquire another company.'

'I understand they specialize in acquisitions.'

"Pistachio almond—that's the buyout."

Human Recources Management

"So far it doesn't look like a hostile takeover."

'This merger will cut jobs 40%, reduce salaries 30% and increase the work hours 25%. Your job is to make this look like the best thing that ever happened to our employees.'

'I'm feeling absolutely marvelous. I think I'll acquire another company.'

"It's strictly business. Please don't take your financial ruin personally."

"I believe he was the victim of a hostile takeover."

'I think we're setting the bar too low.'

'There's a gentleman out here with $643 million. He would like to discuss a takeover.'