Menstruation Magician T-Shirts

'Oh 'eck is it getting near that time of the month again already?'

"Is this to make me feel bad for not getting you that laptop?"

Domestic Goddess.

'First you forget logarithms. Then you forget how to do long division. Then the multiplication table begins to go...'

Team Leader

"And now, a little theorem for all you lovers out there."

'Pass it to Dewey! He's got himself into some kind of rhythm!!'

"She just takes things too seriously in our relationship."

'The path to becoming an astronaut is rougher than I thought.'

'There are lies, damn lies, and statistics. We're looking for someone who can make all three of these work for us.'

"My accountant is brilliant - he has just had a loophole names after him!"

The louder the kid, the tighter the lid.

'Brilliant, Prof.Brainstorm. Any fool can come up with a new product, you've come up with a new tax break.'

'What luck! A sound technician.'

"You haven't been laid off because you're the designated scapegoat."

"Well, I'm studying mathematics and I'm sure that's tougher than math."

"Well, you say it's wrong, but it could be correct in an alternative universe."

"Maths is easy because it's so logical. 2 + 2 obviously equals 22."

'Eureka! After months of research and formulating algorithms, I've done it... I've discovered the secret to 'being cool'!'

Geeky looking guy looks at incomprehensible mathematical problem: 'And this equation proves beyond doubt that I have wasted my life.'

"When you're nailing the numbers, they don't ask questions."

'In this class you will learn to apply the talents of creative writing to accounting.'

'It WAS rather unkind of you to hide his bottle-opener, Mrs Jones.'

Man rotates profit chart so it shows growth not loss.

Professor of Fuzzy Logic.

'My mother says I have a vivid imagination.'

Sister to brother: 'It's kind of like alphabet soup, only for numbers crunchers.'

The Forever Stamp

'I think I'm decisive. Can I get back to you on that?'

Lazy plumber.

'Gifted class, indeed. One is gifted in science, but he can't read - one is gifted in reading, but won't even try math...'

'Let's see if we could put a spin on it and get the public interested.'

'Everyone's using your theorem, Pythagoras. I told you you should have patented it.'