Menopause Maverick T-Shirts

"Not a word, Doc! I'm having hot flashes!"

Signs of Aging: Light headedness, shortening, waxy skin, burn out and hot flashes.

"The third little pig is now a menopausal porker. I hate these hairs on my chinny chin chin."

"It's time we discuss menopause and climax change."

"It's nothing, go back to sleep. I was just getting a DNA sample."

'You think this is hot. Try having hot flashes, too.'

"Extra large sanitary pads and extra small ones, pads for the night..."

Don't have a hot flush....

"My once perky chicken breasts hang like flapjacks, I don't lay eggs anymore, I'm burning up with hot flashes, I'm...."

Menopause and the City

Groups of menopausal women in clinic.

Flash Cuisine

'No Dear, the Tooth Fairy is long gone. I'm the Hot-Flash Fairy.'

Clair regretted having her husband sit in while her doctor described possible side effects of menopause.

'Not to worry. Water retention is a common symptom of menopause.'

"Loss of libido? Have you considered Husband Replacement Therapy?"

'You think irritable fowl syndrome is bad? Just wait until you hit menopause.'

Middle age anxiety about leaving the house.

Hot flashes

'It's my biological clock.'

'Life was moving along at a nice, steady pace, then I hit middle age and my life hot-flashed before my eyes!'

Many women report sleep disturbances associated with the post-menopausal period.

'This isn't any comparison to my going through menopause!'

"We can go with the hormone-replacement therapy or skip straight to the husband replacement."

Flo's kids had a harder time adjusting to their mother's hot flashes than she did.

"I'd better go -- I think my wife's menopause has arrived."

Candle Menopause

Internal Clock

Fables for the Middle-Aged: Goldilocks and the 3 Hairs.

'You know you're 40 when...'

'Night sweats, what night sweats?'

'Listen Buddy! After the hot flushes I've been having this is like a resort!'

'There, there, Mrs Hornsby. Many women your age go through menopausal facial hair growth.'

"Nothing worse than a hot flash when you're retaining water."

'Jason and I are absolutely incompatible. We're both going through the menopause.'