Melodramatic Moments Appreciator T-Shirts

"The coffee machine is out of order again."

Showbiz Awards

Fat Kid 10- Eats an ice-cream

Scarpia from Tosca

"Have mercy on me, Mama. Have mercy on Mr. Pitiful."

'Don't be so dramatic and get into my office!'

Cowboy uses his hat for a private kiss.

"Do you have a boyfriend?"

"It's a narrative I didn't intend."

Next, I recall looking down at myself and thinking, God, what a drama queen.

'She got all the soap opera channels at a discount -- it's some kind of 'frequent cryer' program.'

"Let's start with a couple of glasses of water and if that goes well I'll order two coffees."

Inside the Bermuda Romantic Triangle

"Such a cute doggie! And I'll bet you make the cutest poopies too, don't you?"

''It's me or your stupid racing pigeons' I said - then immediately regretted it.'

"I always know what Harry's going to say, and he always knows what I'm going to say, so, by and large, we just don't bother."

"I'm sensing an awkward presence."

"You play that song once more and I'll break both your hands!"

Musician

Speed Dating Disasters

"Good evening, I'm your date. Let me begin by saying I'm sorry I'm late, I'm sorry I'm bald and I'm sorry I'm short."

"Are you blushing?!"

'Have I ever told you how beautiful you are when you agree with me?'

"Having captions above makes me feel like I'm doing grand opera."

"Can the bride refrain from twitching her entire left side?"

"Hi, I'm on the toilet"

'It's our first date. You don't know me well enough to ask if I'm getting enough fiber.'

Husband Descending a Staircase After Tripping on his Wife's Shoes

'That is the last time we will ask an actor to cut a cake.'

English People With Servants Having Problems - On Demand

'When I die, please cremate me and send my ashes to the tax office. . .Write on the envelope, 'Now, you have everything.''

The Cab of Guilt - "This is your mother, reminding you that if you don't buckle up I will kill myself."