Meeting Minutiae Master Gifts

'Now that we're all comfy Running Elk will read the minutes of the last meeting.'

"Looks like we found the issue."

"Remember the golden rule: more buzzwords, less real words."

"I'm going to bombard you with graphs until you agree with me."

'And were there a point to your proposal, Henderson - What would it be?'

"Forget five-year plans. Let's just figure out how to make it to lunch."

'Williams, we're not used to receiving such excellent ideas as these, so we'd like to tone them down a bit.'

"Can I savor this for a few moments? The ball's never been in my court before!"

"I'm afraid 'It's a surprise', doesn't cut it as a growth strategy."

'Finally! A meeting with one of the bigwigs.'

'When we get there let me do the double talking.'

"The data looks good, sir, but the vibes are mucho heavioso."

"I'd say we were pretty much on target."

'Whoever said 'The only thing we have to fear is fear itself' never had a room full of angry shareholders.'

"Why can't the rest of you be more like Rollins, here? He does his homework!"

'The efficiency expert's recommendation is we drink more coffee!'

"If I might be serious for a moment..."

"You've proven your worth a hundred times over. Let's try for a thousand."

We should take a break. Ron's eyes have turned into spinning rainbow wheels.

'No, your guess isn't as good as mine.'

"What's a debenture?"

"Let's start with an icebreaker..."

'Had I known Hell was going to be exactly like work, I probably wouldn''t have spent as much time there.'

"The meeting will come to order."

'I've learned a lot about myself at these meetings...like, I can fall asleep with my eyes open!'

"I need to see your budget proposal."

What can I do? He says it's his thinking cap.

"Ok, do we agree the minutes of the last meeting?"

'How can we solve this problem by eating?'

'Ah, Galagher, we made good use of your proposal.'

'I'm sorry, but everyone is in a meeting.'

"I drink just enough coffee to make me think I can do my job."

"I'll wait a moment for everyone's energy drink to kick in."

"Dammit, Johnson. You've got to start thinking outside of the box."

'Asynchronous, collaborative, interactive - we're obviously on a roll.'