Meeting Mavericks Pillows

'Well, another important meeting, and once again, I seem to be the only one from the department who remembered to wear his game face!'

'I know it wouldn't hurt them to come! Maybe that's why they're not here.'

'As I see it, our choices are 'no' and 'hell no'.'

'I want ideas so bold, so wildly innovative, so undeniably brilliant that they retain a shred of originality after everyone picks them to pieces.'

'Can't he ever use a different kind of chart?'

Targets.

"He's not sleeping. He always dims his display while downloading data."

'I sometimes wonder if these endless meetings accomplish anything.'

'Surely they're not ALL still in their offices!'

"Every now and then, I find myself in a room filled with people who are wrong."

"Since I am chairman, it behooves me to go first. 'What I Did Over My Summer Vacation,' by Wilson Rupert Hewes."

'Who wants the talking stick?'

"We must kill this initiative, so let's mainstream it."

"I liked it better when you used gobbledygook."

"Who ordered the bravest tuna on all the seven seas, anointed with the spice of faraway lands, on wheat toast?"

"Anything goes today: I want this to be a free and open discussion of my entrenched positions."

'I come from the future - any questions?'

Employee attending a breakfast meeting in his pyjamas.

"The result of our last meeting are impressive: 3 completely solved crossword puzzles, 7 battleship matches, 5 shopping lists, and 26 really funny doodles."

"Seriously, I'm not lost: I'm a travel writer..."

'I say we try it.'

The Acme Agency: Dedicated to life, liberty and the pursuit of media exposure.

Management Speak - reading between the lines: "This new role would involve some extra responsibilities." "He wants me too work twice as hard."

'Beasley, you're a good communicator, look down the table and make eye contact for me!'

'Life isn't fair! Most of the stuff I worried about over the years never even happened!'

"We have a REALLY high turnover rate here."

"Oops! Wrong plug."

'A simple, 'profits are up', would have sufficed.'

"Your Easter bonuses are hidden throughout corporate headquarters."

National Optometrists Association. O.K., whose idea was it to form a focus group?…

'My micro is so good it's beginning to grow into the macro.'

'First, I'd like to welcome the presidents of the two internet networking companies that just merged with us.'

'If you know what's good for you Allan, you'll let me pass.'

"Gotta go. My ten o'clock is here."

'Let's go around the room, and talk about the edgy, creative things we've done so far today.'