Meditation Teacher T-Shirts

"Mom?"

"Exactly what is this 'nothing' I've been hearing so much about?"

All we have in life is this moment...

'I warned him that this was no place for a guy with inner-ear problems.'

'The wisdom of life is to grow older in a warm climate.'

'A sure-win radio talk show. People phone in with questions on existence and reality, and you respond with total silence.'

"Son, it's time you learned the benefits of sitting around doing nothing."

I kid you not, if he calls me 'grasshopper' one more time, I'm cleaning his clock.

Dot Om.

'Yep, I'm alone.'

Working from OM

'Are you meditating or fantasizing?'

'One day, there will be world peace...in the meantime, you may want to step away from the fan.'

"Look, I'm happy to drop my attachment to ego, but please, don't expect me to give up coffee!"

Virtual reality guru.

'I'm going to start living entirely in the now. From tomorrow.'

'Frankly I'm all meditated out.'

Yoga Cow

'I'm finally at one with the universe...but apparently that doesn't include the DOW.'

"I'd read so much about it beforehand that I couldn't help being disappointed when I actually became enlightened."

'Have you been working out?'

"None of this seems to be doing me any good at all!"

'I'll be danged- that's exactly what mom told me.'

'I'm still working on the mystery of how to make a decent living with a tip jar.'

"Let's start meditation class by emptying our minds and clearing our heads."

Is this Seat Taken?

Now there's way over a billion of us. What does confucius say about that?

Guru reading 'Hedonism for Ascetics'

"Here goes nothing."

'There are some things in this world that are just not Googleable.'

"Let's begin with a deep, slow, cleansing breath, through the nose, to a count of 1-2-3-4."

"No, this does not count as screen time."

'I bet I can extinguish my ego before you extinguish YOUR ego!'

"I'm sorry, Lately I've been thoughtless."

'I don't know - asceticism just doesn't seem like ENOUGH any more,'