Meditation Adventurer Gifts

Trans-continental Meditation. 'Are we there yet?'

'Becoming enlightened fifteen minutes before I did doesn't EITHER give you seniority!'

In the future, human thought will enter an age of clarity and purity never before dreamed of.

'The creative process works best with a relaxed brain, so I'm letting my mind wander to let a solution drift in.'

"Break his third chakra!" "Knock the dharma out of him!"

"And these are the Fab Four Noble Truths."

'Let's start out with cliches and pithy slogans - and work our way up to wisdom ...OK?'

"It's a long way to Enlightenment. You might need some cash."

"Who plays ball with the Dalai Lama?" "That's right." "What's right?" "Who plays ball with the Dalai Lama." "Why are you asking me?"

'Uh, Dad - My wife thinks she and I should have a mountain of our own.'

My God, I need to fart.

Meditation

'I'll be back in three or four months - Hold that thought.'

'Oh dear! -- Well, look me up if you ever get reincarnated, okay?'

"It is my place!"

'It says, 'Life is like a transistor.''

Taking a little mental vacation can help as long as you don't go to mental.

'I hate to tell you this, but enlightenment just isn't for commuters.'

Trivia Night in Apartment 8-G

'Oh, yeah? -- Well, my true inner self can whip your true inner self!'

"It's ok -- It's the Enlightenment Channel."

'We've got truth, we've got enlightenment, and we've got serenity - what we NEED is media coverage.'

"... and this is Carol’s stupid meditation room."

"Did you unpack your baggage yourself?"

"You emptied your mind already? That was quick."

'Do you mean 'who cares what the meaning of life is,' or that 'who cares' IS the meaning of life?'

"OK, now what's the meaning of the other eight?"

'Now, until you've attained perfect wisdom, you'll have to learn to evade questions.'

'Oh, the guru is up on the next peak -- I'm his agent.'

'It's normal -- Enlightenment freaks a lot of people out.'

"It looks like we've reached the end of reality..."

I swear, you don't hear a word I don't say.

Grok's Thought Stopping.

Transcend Dental Medication: "Prepare to let go of the pain."

'I understand the Adirondacks are where it's REALLY happening.'