Medical School Maverick Gifts

MEDICAL SCHOOL, 'I didn't know you COULD specialize in insurance.'

'...and now, Gentlemen, we come to our final lecture in advanced cardiology...'

"Hurry, stop him!" (Dog running off with bone from man's x-ray).

'Not feeling well? Don't be silly - your EKG has outperformed the Dow.'

"Nurse, when I asked you to make the patient more comfortable I just meant plump up his pillows!"

Sign in doctors office - Malpractice Makes Perfect.

Finally! A cure for the common cold!

'A little more relaxant I think, nurse.'

'How about a little smile for me. You've outlived my prediction!'

'I like to think of the common bile duct as the gateway to the Bahamas.

Health Care Crisis table.

"You'll never make it as a doctor with handwriting like this. I understood every word."

"We can give you enough medication to alleviate the pain, but not enough to make it fun."

"I give up. Where's the patient?'

'I'm a practical nurse! -- I know better than to listen to doctors!'

These drug will cost you an arm and a leg...the good news is, my wife and I own stock in the company that makes them.

'No Mis Evans. You know only substitute teachers are allowed to carry taser guns!'

'In the doctor's defense, there have been no serious post operative complications.'

Locum GP's to be paid for extra work on the BMA agreement

First aid departments

"While you were under, I had all your friends come in and sign your heart stent."

'A woman obsetrician! What do women know about that sort of thing?'

"To be honest, most of our work involves reassuring patients until nature cures them..."

"We could try reversing the drug's side effects with gene therapy, but we don't want to get into trouble with the SPCA."

'Brain surgery, Harold? Have you lost your mind?!'

'Doctor, the patient would like to know when he can return to being an overbearing, stressed-out pig?'

DO IT YOURSELF - Four new jobs we'll all have to do ourselves

"When they said they were bringing in students I thought they meant MEDICAL students."

Cleaner with nameplate next to Consultant Surgeon's desk.

Celebration in operating theatre.

'That was quick!'

Fred questions whether Dr. McWit's Quick Draw Stress Tests are AMA approved.

"Shows you how much I know."