Medical Professor Gifts

'I don't need a bed pan, but an oil pan would be nice.'

"Ya know, 'DUH' can be a very hurtful word."

"Do you want to play doctorate?"

"Chocolate? I can't be allergic to chocolate! I'm a kid, can't you say I'm allergic to spinach or broccoli?"

Where your mind & battle are los

'... And some primitive cultures, believed that 'the great ones' modelled us from clay.'

"1984 by George Orwell. Project 2025. Presidential transition project."

"Of course he's smiling. He's getting $15,000 to give a lecture on free speech."

"She's fine. She just needs some tofu."

"My older self travels back just to remind me to put the cap back on this pen?"

"Welcome to the future"

Lady taking her little dog to the chemist with a cough

Ethics exam cheater.

"That's the guy I hired to read Proust for me."

2021

A female patient in an exam room sees a sign that reads, 'Break glass in case of physician burnout'

"Too bad about old Ainsworth. Published and published, but perished all the same."

Blue Stockings - Woman revealing herself as author

Bob encounters one of the bugs in the Jean Paul Sartre fan website.

'Dr.Sall Thompson got so excited over the new spring design she took a quantum leap!'

'Medical school's been more challenging since the cadavers turned into zombies.'

"If a stock falls in the market, and it had no investors, does it really lose its value?"

"Boy, am I glad they finally hired more staff!"

Hey, calm down --- Now, what did you say again?

"Do you want to pretend to be a doctor and I'll pretend to be a hotshot civil litigation attorney who sues you till your ears bleed?"

Grad School Parent-Teacher Conference

"I don't think you're getting enough stress."

'If you give up alcohol, cigarettes, sex, red meat, cakes and chocolate, and don't get too excited, you can enjoy life for a few more years yet.'

"I've always dreamed of being on an academic team like this! It's great that we can all depend on each other!"

"Okay, now breathe another sigh of relief."

Big Bang Theory.

"His first out-of-body experience."

"Unfortunately, once the child contracts Pokémon, he lives with it forever."

"E=MC² Energy=Milk·Coffee²"

"We've made great progress!"