Medical Mischief Maker Pillows

The Left One As You Look At It.

'The sport wasn't on your lung...It was on the x-ray...barbecue sauce...please sand by for an apology and a great explanation from my nurse...'

'I've got acid indigestion.'

'Good news! Your positives look negative.'

Doctor, I can't feel my legs! I know you can't, I had to amputate your arms.

"I'd like you to supply me with a urine, faeces and sperm sample Mr Brooks."

'A second opinion would be appreciated only if confirms my opinion.'

"No, I'm not prescribing a plasma T. V. for you, just plasma."

Less expensive equivalent.

'You've swallowed your Adam's apple.'

"Well, you passed some of the tests, but you failed others. I'm afraid you'll have to repeat grade 8."

Newt sale

'No, you can't use your last wish, to wish for another three wishes!'

'I thought my appointment was for a TB screening.'

"I give up. Where's the patient?'

'Guess what I'd like to see disappear next.'

'Have you tried hitting Ctrl-Alt-Delete?'

"I've just discovered this brilliant new ingredients."

'Yes doctor, it did hurt when you did that!'

Knights

Jack started to note how these 'accidents' always occurred after he missed a shot.

"...And I cheated at solitaire...twice."

"Hey, were it up to me, you'd be here for another few days, but then I'm not your insurance company."

"Sending out 1300 redundancy notices by mistake was a bit of a blooper!"

What have you done with the spare filter paper, please? I've made you a hat miss!

'Terrific commercial. I'm sold. You'll start on that medicine immediately.'

'You're fine. Now get out of my office!'

Frankie the discount genie

"Time of death, 11:55." "Wait, what?" "No, sorry, my phone died."

"That's not the boiling oil, that's my casserole!"

'What are you complaining about...they told you this was MINOR surgery!'

'I gave you a few extra stitches - Your husband's idea, really!'

"Nurse, you've mixed up the helium and oxygen again haven't you ?"

'Mr Mundello, when I said strip to the waist, I meant for you to start at the top.'

"No, no, no! My old 45 records do not belong in the craft box!"