Medical Graduate Gifts

'I told you he wouldn't waste any time starting his practice.'

"Hi, I'm Dr. Jenkins." "Nice to meet you. I'm Bachelor of Science Johnson."

'Medical school's been more challenging since the cadavers turned into zombies.'

'OK, the old one's in my right hand, the donor's in my left. Rght?'

"Unfortunately, your son swallowed a great deal of industrial adhesive. But don't worry: Epoxy can be cured."

Captain Ahab searched for a vaccine.

"Make a lot of money."

"Let's consider an early dive."

Dancing Doctor

'Before you see any patients have you completed your hand sterilisation and soap management course?'

"That's an awfully large small intestine and an awfully small large intestine."

Good Luck!

'A depressing thought just came over me. Now we'll have to go out and get a job!'

"All my symptoms are old ... "

'My medical school believed laughter is the best medicine.

'...and now, Gentlemen, we come to our final lecture in advanced cardiology...'

'Well, what do I have?...Within reason, of course.'

'AHH, here it is! At the next intersection, turn left, then cough, following that, turn right, then cough...' WHEN DOCTORS NAVIGATE.

'Hello, I'm Dr. Frank Stein and this is my anaesthetist, Dr. Ivan Gore. We'll be doing your hernia operation tomorrow.'

'He's our new Bone Specialist!'

Dog forced to return bone

'It may be more inconvenient, but the 'Reverse Prostate Exam' is a lot less embarrassing for the both of us.'

'That was creepy. They ran short on cadavers, so we operated on the dean of students.'

'Good thing it has a child-proof cap.'

'I still want to be a cowboy.'

'What's holding him up?'

'I chose my field on what would put the most impressive initials after my name.'

'I took a couple of years off after college to work on my smirk.'

'Do years 4, 5 and 6 cover the other foot?'

'The doctor will acknowlege your existance now.'

"Gross."

'I wasted a lot of time in graduate school to get this job.'

En garde!

"It's interpret-your-own-test-results day today."