Media Maven Pillows

Melvyn Bragg.

Gettysburg Address, "Now can we have it as a sound bite ?"

'This is strictly off the record...'

Breakfast Printing Press

'Sleaze, please.'

In the Guru District

"Here's what went wrong today."

"Now here's my co-anchor, Nancy, with a conflicting account of that very same story."

'Frankly, I'd expected rather more from interactive television.'

Man with mobile phone says: 'I can't call for help, I'm filming this for the TV news.'

"The nationwide recall and the class action lawsuits have established brand recognition for us."

'Let me rephrase your question and answer with a 10 second sound bite to catch the next news cycle.'

"I can't decide whether to specialize in criminal law or legal punditry."

Stop the press, we've got an exclusive press release.

'The online version just doesn't offer as much coverage as printed media.'

No news is good news.

'Although nothing newsworthy happened today, we will give you meaningless chatter, with the same enthusiasm we reserve for breaking news.'

'And this is Paul, who writes our 'Voice of Sanity' column.'

'He's really putting that media studies degree to good use.'

Janet Street-Porter.

'When did we lose our targeted audience status?'

"There will be a Q&A...but in this era of Trump I will be insulting anyone whose questions I don't like."

Life is better with a laugh track and graphics.

"We're starting to get media coverage. Pass it on."

'I do all of my negotiating through the media.'

'You're going to stitch me up in this interview aren't you?'

"Let me answer your question by saying that you're being really aggressive, and it's totally freaking me out."

Reality show pitch

Icebergs talk about CNN appearance and looking thin on TV.

'My degree is in journalism but with a major emphasis in celebrity gossip.'

"Sorry, boys. I was told to keep my big mouth shut."

Interviewing Drowning Man

"The much ballyhooed era of TV interactivity took a step closer to reality today."

David Letterman

'From the very beginning we felt that defeating the Big Bad Wolf would be meaningless unless we could parlay it into a book deal.'