Media Industry Insider Gifts

'See, I told you - nobody's job is safe!'

The Future: "Sorry, but I have to show you an ad now."

"There's no such thing as 'bad publicity'." "All traffic is good traffic."

In the Guru District

"You're losing the audience. Switch to the Powerpoint presentation."

Squeezing the Free Press.

'You'll like this, gang ? it's an 'eyes-only' list of 'shady-but-tolerated' loopholes allowed by the Securities and Exchange Commission.'

News and Magazines. Celebrity gossip. Sports scandals. Political bickering. We're out of the "information age" and well into the "too much information age"!

"I've seem an awful lot of movies ever since they cut them all down to two minutes."

"And now here's Cathie with the hypothetical portion of the news."

'If only every year was an election year.'

Press Freedom

"...And do you Sean Spicer take Kelly Anne Conway..." "The marriage of alternative facts"

Lesser known greek gods,

Studies show foods work miracles!

There's a crew here from 60 minutes and they're coming this way.

"This just in: According to a recent poll, painkillers have replaced religion as the opiate of the masses."

'Contrary to the popular view, our studies show that it is real life that contributes to violence on television.'

"Which news channel should we watch?"

"I'm going to miss it when they stop warning us"

"We've won control of the congress. Our next objective is to win control of the media."

"We live in the golden age of fake news, alternative facts and spin control. Your resume is too truthful."

Lies/Damned Lies/Social Media

"Britain's Got Talent is now in its tenth astonishingly brilliant year!"

"Er...nothing much has happened yet today...."

'My plan for the mid east has approval of both Houses of Congress, Oprah, Larry King, Lettermen and Leno.'

'This one is for keeping 'On Message' in the spin wars.'

"I actually saw ten gay characters on television this week—which almost balanced out the 2,174 straight characters I saw."

'Sorry, Marx, but your writing ability doesn't meet our needs.'

'Apologists today said little white lies -- but not the big lie -- may have played a part in Iraq Policies....'

"That newspaper has been showing up ever since you started reading the news online. I think it feels betrayed."

"I love being your agent, Nick, but the guys making the really big bucks now are the managers. Let me be your manager."

Newspaper suicide.

Fifty shades of Leveson.

'Georgy Porgy kiss 'n' tell story.'