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"Apparently they hand out awards for something called 'television.' "

Television repeated repeats Awards

"What's up? No trash in your paper today?"

"They grow up so fast."

"I caution everyone to avoid taking the first field reporter job that comes along."

"I'll do the movie but I want to be highly compensated and highly acclaimed."

'Desert island cartoons - and you?'

"The following programme contains scenes of a very noisy vacuum cleaner."

"Hey grandpa, tell us more about the time you were in that Steven Spielberg movie."

"Well, how do things look from where you sit?"

Television Readers.

Create some buzz!

Gay Times...

"Seth, here, is one of the best young creative compromisers in the business."

"Bloody hell!"

"Now we move over to the sports desk."

"I love it when you use your 'All Things Considered' voice."

'We interrupt this programme for a sex flash.'

'They're just like us, except they watch more television.'

Canadian film production

"It's a 'Black eye friday'. I got it in a fight over a 56 inch TV."

Moby Dick

"Where have you been? This content's not going to create itself."

"We need to make it through at least one movie, so we have something to root for during the Oscars."

"At some point, there's only so high you can raise the volume before you admit you're never gonna understand what British detectives are saying."

'Action!...Cut!...Right, everything else is CGI'

Newspaper suicide.

'-Not THE Queen Vic?'

'So no animals were harmed in that movie...but how about the audience?!'

'No, you can't just watch the end of Bargainhunt!'

'Come quick: Rin Tin Tin is on TV again...'

'And I love the part when he finds out that it was his brother all along!'

100 best beheadings