Meal Mischief Enthusiast T-Shirts

Waiter, there's a wireless earbud phone in my soup.

'Meat cooked, but carrots still hard.' Hand in pot

'No! No more harps! I can't take it anymore.'

"Charles didn't like tofu."

"And for dessert, I'd like the mice pudding."

"How do you prepare the chicken?"

The Aisle

"How did I find my lamb chop? Well, I lifted up a roast potato and there it was."

'I can't have you spending all of your money on fancy restaurants like this, Jeff.'

'They're not mints - they're antacid tablets.'

'In case of emergency, break glass.'

Babies who Lunch.

"Still workin' on that, sir?"

"Chicken on a bend of spinach and onions?"

'Your trouble is that you don't appreciate good food.'

"They've agreed to drop the charges, but only if you agree never to stuff the turkey again."

'You still have breakfast and lunch on your dinner menu.'

'You ordered the stuffed sea bass, didn't you?'

"Very impressive. . . internet troll."

'My doctor said I'm digging my own grave with a spoon and fork. It'll take longer if I use only a fork.'

'What's this rumor I hear, that they're putting saltpeter in Meals-On-Wheels!'

Waiter: 'Your Chicken wings Ma'am.'

"Tonight, the part of the sea bass will be played by the chicken."

At The Skinny Customer Restaurant

'Begging at the table again, eh?'

The Toast Hunter

'I'll take a six-piece 'Surprise Me' meal, and two 'Don't Ask, Don't Tell' Wraps with Super Enigma Chunks...'

'Oh, I was hoping '8G on the potato salad' was code for some lewd act you were suggesting.'

'Have you seen my husband? I left him by the lobster tank a few minutes ago!'

'Something moved!'

An eerie hush fell over the audience when Myrtle responded, 'it tastes likes chicken. . .'.

"And you say this was the serving suggestion?"

'...Forbidden foods are only allowed when cheating...'

This time, Eddie was going to pay for this.

'Throw Your Money Down a Rathole' vending machine.