Meal Maker Pillows

These scramble eggs are a tad crunchy. Did you leave the shells on again, Darling?

Counting ribs

Domestic Goddess.

"Everything on our menu uses organic, locally sourced, graveyard-to-table ingredients."

Frozen Turkey: "I hate to bother you on a holiday but I'm freezing out here. Do you have a heated enclosed space I could rest inside for four to five hours?"

It turns out they don't go together so well,

Joe's Kaff for Dinners! And Afters Too!

Happy Surrogate Thanksgiving

"Who shaves the fennel in your family?"

"I bet you can't name one person who makes a better lengua casserole than me!"

"How did I find my lamb chop? Well, I lifted up a roast potato and there it was."

'Oh, sure, it gets the creative juices going, but is it worth the cost?'

Tonight, on the microwave channel... chicken pot pie!

"We'd like bruschetta, and we'd like it pronounced correctly."

A shop is called 'Garnishes: Top Meals in Tough Times'.

'Not beans on toast again.' - 'No, toast on beans. I dropped it.'

"We'll have to eat out tonight - I misplaced the can opener."

"Your kneads? What about my kneads?"

"Do you like eye of newt in your Mac 'n' Cheese?"

"I have a strong personal commitment to dinner."

"Elaine! The avocados are ripe—what do we do? What do we do?"

'Waiter, I don't remember ordering this gristle!'

"I'm leaving you for someone who does care what we have for dinner."

Looks like I do dishes again.

'My fortune says you're a liar, so I won't even ask what yours says.'

'Are you still eating your breakfast? I want to lay the table for lunch.'

Cows on pogo-sticks creating milkshakes.

Our housekeeping

Catering for a large family.

'What do you mean you're not hungry?'

Roger wouldn't prepare any meal without first consulting his pie chart.

'I know you're in a hurry, so I ran all the leftovers through the blender.'

Grandchildren's Menu: Whatever's on your plate and no funny business

Knead Dough? Apply Here!

Turkey Goes Into Dressing Room and Comes Out Cooked