Mcu Devotee Pillows

"I witnessed something I can never unsee." "What happened, little buddy?" "Some guy walking out of the 'Wolverine' premiere shouted spoilers to the crowd that was waiting to see the second show." "A bunch of the fans who were dressed in costumes got so angry they attacked him." "I don't think I can ever unsee five Pyros and a Colossus beating a Happy Hogan with plastic flamethrowers." "Happy Hogan had it coming."

Cristiano Ronaldo

"Phil, could I speak to you for a moment, not as your doctor but as your horse?"

The Wonder Gym.

Turning with mathematical precision.

Rudy Giuliani's shrine

'Yes, that's all - isn't 1500 calories enough?'

Cricket widow's revenge

'And a second degree in Australian studies.'

'Stroke! ... Stroke! ... Stroke!'

"We just want you to know that wherever you wind up going to college is fine with us, as long as it's someplace we can brag about to our friends."

Jeff gives it up for Lent.

"Sorry, Kevin, but 'March Madness' is not an official school holiday."

'Bad news, coach. His test came back positive for spending hours in the weight room pumping iron.'

"What do I suggest for tight glutes? For best results, squeeze from the bottom."

Bruno Fernandes

Tennis Fan

'Welcome to gamblers anonymous. Now before we get started who bets that Simmons doesn't show?'

Barmy army

NFL is jerk to fans

And again

"If I'm collecting for one cause, I may as well collect for them all."

Two military officers

"Now I lay me down to sleep. I pray the Trump his rants will keep. If he should tweet before I wake, I pray my votes the Trump won't take."

'After Fred dreamed of Linda he felt as though he'd cheated on his motorcycle.'