Matrimonial Maven T-Shirts

And do you promise to love, honour and take out a whopping great pension.

No kicking: 12-6 Mon-Sun

"He's going to be O.K., but he still wants you to remarry."

"Like that?"

'Motherhood is great, but I get a really sore back...'

'I suppose you think that's funny.'

'It's not as easy as you think - saddle sores, bursitis in the shoulder, pigeons...'

'In memory of our beloved Skippy.'

"Let me connect you with Edith, our specialist in ethnic conflict in the former Yugoslavia. My expertise happens to be in North Korean intransigence."

"This is Mr. Harrington, our mortgage nerd."

"Arthur, I need my space."

Maternity Unit - 'Congratulations! It's a midwife!'

"First, I'll read the minutes from your last weddings."

"It's nice, but does it have a batcave?"

'But why do you want to transmute asparagus into cotton?'

"Damn it, Gwendolyn, you know when you married me I only moved one square at a time."

"'Routine examination' were the only two words in the doctor's mind when he placed the stethoscope on..."

'I'm putting you on a diet: No more fat knights, maidens only...'

"Call me Ishmael."

'We can mortgage your future for a very attractive low interest rate.'

Welcome to the uterus. Please be seated. Your mother will be with you in nine months.

"It's my attorney. Have you seen my list of things about you that drive me crazy?"

'And Remember delivery is free if it happens in a half hour!'

'All he wants is sex, sex, sex!'

'But sinister gales - with that armour?'

Mothercare - " I'm going to shop till I drop."

I have a dream.

"I'll kill you if you crack your knuckles again."

'You're docile enough alright, but I don't like how you grind your teeth while you sleep!'

Don't bother Daddy -- he's just upset because Lady Godiva joined the anti-Crusade movement.'

Stan believes in calling a spade a spade.

"Would you like to meet Kate? She's an acceptable risk."