Maths Nerd Gifts

'Today we're going to subtract how old you are fom how many years your parents have been married!'

'What I don't understand is how all three of us managed to get the figures wrong!'

'You may now turn over your paper and begin.' - 'Sir!' - 'Yes?' - 'What is it?' - 'I think Train 'A' and Train 'B' might be going to crash!'

"Together ideas for couples" "Slap a sandwich together" "Put two and two together" "Pull themselves together" "Rub two sticks together" "Try to hold it together" "String a phrase together"

Great Chinese Dynasties

"Finally, after years of work, irrefutable proof that I'm a nerd."

'Einstein, the children are getting too complex for me.'

"E=MC² Energy=Milk·Coffee²"

'According to our statistics department, 78.93 of the statistics they produce are worthless.'

'But I digress...'

Can't Do the Math/Won't Do the Math.

'If he knows so much about stocks and shares, how come he still has to work?'

Smart Ass - Wise Ass

"I didn't finish the proof but I did write this poem about my struggle."

"But everyone is befuddled by math."

'Uhhh... Houston, we have a problem.'

"Do you promise to love, honour and contribute to the gross national product?"

Pi Ala Mode.

Math 101, for those who can only count to 100.

'I got 100 in school today. 50 in history and 50 in maths.'

"If i were to kiss you then there is a 17% probability that we might get married and that has a 24% likelihood that we'd have children with a 34% change of divorce...I'm not sure I can risk it."

A Major Refresher Course is in Order.

New Road Signs to Watch For:

"If x is the set of all men that love you, then I am a member of x."

"I know it may be wrong, but it's how I feel."

"I'm going to prove that Math comes in handy later in life."

"Gifted class, indeed! One is gifted in science, but can't rad - one is fixed in reading, but won't even try math..."

'I know! It's what I had last night for dinner.'

"Or we could tally the sheep like this."

'I have to agree -- the value of pie goes on indefinitely.'

'Maths is fun!'

'Scratch 3 and 5. 3's had a fight and 5's just going to live together instead.'

'Single math professor in search of an intelligent woman. Send an example of your favorite equation.'

The theory that ‘Time is Relative' came to the professor during a Decelerated Math Class.

"Let's get married, Miss Harris, and have 2.8 children!"