Mathemagician T-Shirts

'That's my accountant - he figures out my points total on ducks.'

"Ya know, 'DUH' can be a very hurtful word."

"Together ideas for couples" "Slap a sandwich together" "Put two and two together" "Pull themselves together" "Rub two sticks together" "Try to hold it together" "String a phrase together"

"Finally, after years of work, irrefutable proof that I'm a nerd."

Typical Brain Versus Einstein's Brain

'According to our statistics department, 78.93 of the statistics they produce are worthless.'

"She's done it! The formula for work-life balance!"

Thinking Gears

Can't Do the Math/Won't Do the Math.

Smart Ass - Wise Ass

Math Dreams

"If a third grader knows the answer, how much of a problem can it really be?"

"But everyone is befuddled by math."

"I didn't finish the proof but I did write this poem about my struggle."

"Oh, stop it. You are not at all obtuse." Complimentary angles make the other angles feel good about themselves.

'First you forget logarithms. Then you forget how to do long division. Then the multiplication table begins to go...'

Girl does mathematical equation. Man says 'Tut! Teenagers today and their problems ...'

'Uhhh... Houston, we have a problem.'

Pi Ala Mode.

Interdisciplinary studies.

Math 101, for those who can only count to 100.

'I got 100 in school today. 50 in history and 50 in maths.'

'According to creation mathematicians, all of Euclid's theories were originally found etched into rocks.'

'I started out as a teacher's pet, and then it kind of snowballed.'

Archimedes statue with a lever

'I'll give you a clue. The answer is a number, not a fruit.'

"If i were to kiss you then there is a 17% probability that we might get married and that has a 24% likelihood that we'd have children with a 34% change of divorce...I'm not sure I can risk it."