Maternity Humor Enthusiasts Pillows

'Now this time remember - we refer to the babies as 'quadruplets,' not 'the litter!''

'Are you pregnant? How do you know? You look terrible!'

No kicking: 12-6 Mon-Sun

Push Push Push: sign on maternity ward doors.

'Ever since I've started showing, my husband has affectionately called me 'Three Humps'...'

"On no, the baby's breach!!"

Maternity Ward

"Mum's biological clock is ticking away...OOPS!...my mistake. That's indigestion."

"Don't be so dramatic. You tell me you're pregnant every day?"

Womb service: A special room service for pregnant Women

The Elephant in the Womb

Pregnant Woman - "I think it's coming gift-wrapped."

'You want Chinese food? Are you going to have a baby or something?'

'We're hoping to sell the naming rights.'

'Here's one I made earlier!'

"Nine months in here?? I trust I can get out in seven months with good behaviour!"

'This is boring. This uterus could sure do with a fast forward button.'

"Six down, three to go!!"

"I'm sorry, but we're not an online retailer. We can't guarantee delivery in 2 days."

Maternity ward (door sign.. push push).

'If you don't like fathers in the delivery room, where will you be?'

Maternity ward on the farm.

Caution: False Contractions Ahead

Maternity Wing Sign: Please Wait To Push

"Hard to tell...He was wearing a mask."

"I told you I was too old to have a baby."

Pregnant vs. Old.

The Impractical Guide to Having Babies: 'Could I examine your cervix?'

The Last Few Weeks of Pregnancy.

'Houdini's mother had an odd and difficult pregnancy.' 'Oh no. He's gone again!'

"We offer free delivery if you spend over $15,000."