Materialism Philosopher Gifts

'We just need to make sure you didn't take it with you.'

Desk plaques: 'Money isn't everything' '...Which makes it no less awesome in my opinion.'

"I shop, therefore I am."

"You cheap shit! Why can't we have a designer divorce?"

"Well, what would YOU like for Christmas?"

"I'll take new members any way I can get them."

"It all started when I didn't grow up in a palatial estate."

"Most of my consumerism is self-taught."

'And remember: just hold up this little green paper, and they will do whatever you want.'

"When I was making money, I made the most money, and now that I'm spiritual I'm the most spiritual."

"Not only is the grass greener, but check out that Mercedes!"

We just assumed everyone knew they couldn't take it with them.

Robert Macaire recieving expensive gifts from his love

"Well, maybe money can't buy happiness, but I'm willing to try."

"My third and final wish is for money and wealth—again!"

"So you can take it with you!"

New Gods

"And this is a picture of John when we still had a Lamborghini."

"I misplace everything, yet there always seems to be more of it."

The Worship of Money

'Shallow, so you think I'm shallow do you? Just because I happen to think my career is important, that my car matters and that clothes make a difference.'

"Good morning, Mrs. Kiley."

Consumerism junkie.

Other Patron Saints of Christmas

"Never mind."

"For Gladys it's not the thought that counts, it's the size of the gift."

"Depending on who you know, you CAN take it with you. See anything you like?"

"This can't be heaven, where's the shops?"

'Who told you about my lottery win?'

Capitalism sinks while Karl Marx's Capital stays afloat.

"To eventually be rich enough to throw away brand new stuff."

'What?! Oh, that's just an expression. Of course you can take it with you!'

U-can take it with you funerals.

"All the money in the world, and nothing good to buy."

Empty pockets (four of them).