Master Of Lawn Envy T-Shirts

"His grass really is greener!"

'Behold. Ed and Jim have finally reached nirvana.'

"First time pruning?"

"You've just got to have the biggest and the best, have'nt you?!"

'Congratulations! Our yard's been declared a national wilderness area!'

Mulching Vacuum Cleaner

A man repeatedly pulls the start cord on his lawn mower until it falls apart.

"Can you cut the grass but leave the daisies?"

Couple who have confused their baby's pram and the lawn mower.

A sign on the front lawn of a house reads "Keep off the chemicals".

"Mulch madness"

"The gods seem angrier than usual today."

Three different categories of lawnmower.

'George! This way quick!'

"Al emerged from his man cave and saw crabgrass. That means 6 months of obsessing about crabgrass."

'I'm finding the greens a bit slow.'

"Basically, I'm looking for a beer can holder with a mower built around it."

'I can't get my husband to water the lawn.'

The Scottish Lawn

Beware of the Lawn

Dispose of unproductive fruit trees.

'If I've calculated correctly, I have two more birthdays before I never have to mow the lawn again.'

'This veldt makes me worry about the condition of our yard back home.'

'I'm making one of the craters into a birdbath.'

Mowing the Bottle-Garden

'Fred's opinion of crab grass is if you can't beat it, join it.'

'Despite her numerous advanced degrees, Dr.Bessie couldn't keep her mouth from watering.'

Lawn mower - must get longer cable

Death upgrades to a strimmer

'The grass is always greener on the other side seed'.

Mower Repair

Wen leaf blowers become too powerful.