Master Of Defense Pillows

Party of two? No, it was quite a large party.

'Remember me?'

'These hors d'oeuvres are real slop, and I mean that in the best sense.'

"It's all a matter of planning...."

Kiss the Commander in Chef

"I know you've been waiting a long time, but the Pearls were here before you."

"I’ll have something for you as soon as Table Seven sees the entrée prices."

Maitre d' to astronaut couple entering restaurant: 'Gravity or no-gravity?'

"It's an extra $2.00 if you want a candle with a wick."

War Heros Variety Night (playing a tune on his medals).

"...I should have seen it coming...The busboys, the waiters, the dishwashers, the maitre d', all stealing shrimp, caviar, lobster, but ah, the strawberries, that's where I had them?"

"A table in Siberia, please."

'I hate playing stinkbugs! Every time we press them on defense, they just let 'e rip!'

A restaurant with a "Main Dining Room" and a "Room for Dessert".

"Smoking or nonsmoking?"

"Is the slop fresh?"

'What do I do for a living?? Isn't it obvious?'

'No tables are available at this time. Would you be interested in take-out?'

'Believe it or not you're our greatest liability Jones!'

Of Congress can't come to an agreement on a spending plan...

'Watch it, I'm a black belt.'

Cat Kung Fu

Stun-gun target practice.

'Believe it or not you're our greatest liability Jones!'

'Could you hurry up on that order for table five? -- they're holding the maitre d' hostage.'

"Relax―all I want is a good table."

'I don't know if I could really do that to a man.'

The Karate Master

'He has a real quiet way about him...until the feed runs out.'

'He said it could be about 45 minutes, due to the global economic slowdown.'

'Mr Thurber, come at me like you're going to sexually harass me!'

"Haven't you heard! There's going to be a bit of a reshuffle!"