Mascot Fans Pillows

"It does seem like a school-approved activity."

Mr. Metamorphosis: "At least this better than waking up as a cockroach."

'Originally he was the mascot until we discovered he had a golden foot.'

A golden Big Boy holding a plate of poop

A man washing a mascot costume

"That's our new church mascot."

'Sorry about this, but I really need a rug for my bachelor pad.'

"I found the perfect summer job! 'Greet people at retail store. Company uniform required. Must be able to carry small children.' How hard can that be?"

Animals flying kites patterned like their skins.

"Okay, ha ha, now seriously...Where's the rest of the nuts?"

"I gotta flat. Can you get the spear out of the trunk."

'Okay, men, let's go out and win one for the flipper.'

Happy birthday Darling!

"Well, we got the grant."

'It's a new medication I'm working on, but the side effects are monsterous.'

'Last warning, Girard! Get rid of that mask!'

Med School Mascots.

"Pardon my glove."

The Thurston State Hornets make their entry onto the field.

"It's all about teamwork. We even have our own mascot."

Mr Met

"What do you mean hot dog is out sick?—but I'll look stupid all by myself!"

"Why do you always wear pants?"

'Where in the rules does it say I can't keep a mascot in the goals?'

'While we're at it - let's cruise the Bahamas!'

"...and finally..."

'It's my feature wall.'

"It's just like that thing you've got under your bed, only this one is for old people."

'I bought him off the Internet. Don't be alarmed if there's a small charge on your credit card.'

"Brrr! Lucky you, growing your own blanket!"

"Does this hat say 'cosmic terror beyond mortal sanity?'"

A woman opens her washing machine and the missing sock monster climbs out.

"Yes we need it back. The team fired you, not Sharky."

Jeepers Creepers Billy, Can you wait until halloween to wear that? You're scaring me half to death.

"Mr. Peanut is my dad—you can call me Rick."