Martyr Complex Explorer T-Shirts

Martyr Complex

'If you were disturbed by any issues raised, please call your mum.'

You're dead to me, Marsha. And that's just the way I like it."

'Hey, what am I, chopped liver?'

TV - MARS, weather: 'Very hot and dry days, bitterly cold nights and no precipitation for the next several million years!'

Ventriloquist Grave

“I don’t mind doing the dishes every night—it gives me time to deepen my resentment.”

"I'm afraid we're going to have to remove your appendix."

John Ixon: Ran Out of Survival Tips.

Pranking Zombies

Quicksand Swamp - Cheap Burial Plots.

"The worst is behind us!"

Headstone reading 'Only Sleeping'.

Mummy Tourists

'Wasn't there three of you guys when we started?'

"You won't believe how many Frisbees are up here!"

Mummies for Dummies

'Good evening sir.Just wondering if you'd like to sample Night-Mart's new range of A-positive.'

"There it is! There's the evidence Mars once had a lake!"

This wasn't quite the fairytale ending Colin had anticipated.

"It's soon to be listed in the National Register of Historic Military Holes in the Ground."

'A bathroom!!'

'Who are you calling ancient?'

'Just stop listening to Public Broadcasting, and your guilt complex should clear right up!'

Owner tells dog to put back all the bones he's dug up

Cat scratch fever

Oil Tower at Mount Rushmore

"Back in 15 min."

Grandpa cheats death, puts in a pool.

Michael Hall 1930-2002: wonderful father, devoted husband, benevolent employer, generous citizen, BUT...

Easter Island moai shake hands below the surface.

King: 'I said build me a stone HENGE you FOOL! NOT stone HENS!!'

'I've never felt so alive...'