Marshmallow Maestro Gifts

"He must be a pro. He's got his own stick."

Take seat. Nothing makes me happier than keeping people warm and cooking s'mores for them. Friendly fire.

"...and what really makes this story scary is the kittens got lost in the woods before flea and tick products were invented."

Marshmallows

Harsh Mellows.

Peter Pan, the Utensil that Never Grew Up

'Nothing impacts my lifestyle choices more than a veterinarian with a scale.'

You're arrogant, aloof and spoiled...but I mean that in the nicest way.

"Dad! Dad! It's freezing out here! I wish we had a fireplace to get all cozy and roast marshmallows!"

"It was a dark and stormy night, for the Wi-Fi was down."

"My calculations are complete. We could toast 12,000 marshmallows every day for every person on earth for 36,000 years with one solar flare."

'The Torch Holder'.

'Aren't these marshmallows just going to make us plumper for when the bears ultimately eat us?'

"I don't know, maybe I'm just being mallowdramatic."

'Marshmallows ready! Now for the roasting...'

'Your father's a genius kids. First he discovered fire and now marshmallows.'

The lesser known active volcanoes.

"Really? You mean you’ve never smoked a joint?"

The Burning Bush: How God convinced Moses to Lead His people a.k.a. the origin of s'mores.

1% Cereal: Now with marshmallow dollar signs.

Two men discussing thier moustaches

Garden Centre: Bonsai trolleys.

Marshmallow Roast

Before you feed him/After you feed him.

Emergency box in woods contains supplies for a campfire.

'Mess with me if you have to, son, but not with the regimental moustache!'

Nuclear Families

Black Truffles!

"First beach?"

Scary Marshmallow Campfire Stories.

'Get the kind with the little marshmallows.'

'My dad is away, so we can play...'

How to wear a false moustache.

"Meow!"

The Sacrificial Peep