Marriage Maze Explorer Pillows

"My marriage is like a walk in the park. Jurassic is a park, right?"

"In lieu of a pre-nup we decided just to label everything."

Too much togetherness can lead to unexpected problems.

Newlyweds. . . 10 Years Married. . . 25 Years Married. . . 50+ Years Married.

"We hope seeing a marriage counselor maybe could make one of us less stubborn!"

Okay, I'll admit I was wrong. But I won't say what I was wrong about.

"I see marriage as a verb, he sees it as a triathlon."

"Remember, it's the journey not the destination."

An angry Scientist has discovered his two Lab' mice are using a GPS to find their way through a maze to some cheese.

"OK, now what?"

'Don't be so sensitive,I only dozed of for a moment.'

An x-ray reveals a man imprisoned in the mind of another man.

"Hey, at least you got a severance package."

"Do you...enter name...take...enter name...to be your...choose one from the pull down menu...click the I do icon now please."

"Go about a foot and take a right, then it's the second left, no, no ... the third left, then straight …"

'Can't you be happy without forever whistling?'

"Morning, Brad." "Morning, Angelina."

"We can't even agree what to argue about any more!"

"I'm going to New Zealand for a walk."

KEEP YOUR FRIENDS CLOSE AND YOUR ENEMIES CLOSER, 'That kind of thinking leads to marriage.'

'He's not the man I married. In fact, none of them are.'

My wife is the inspiration behind the light speed spaceship - the longer I'm married, the more I want to be the first human who lives on Mars.

Mrs. Almighty.

Too Weird to Have a Husband

"Steve and I live together, but we're getting indicted separately."

'We tried marriage your way and it didn't work. Now it's my way!'

'Everyone does divorces, Mrs.Dawson.'

"You have superior extra ocular muscle strength - how often do you roll your eyes at your husband?"

"Honey, wake up! I just remembered something you did that annoyed the hell out of me!"

"This is one of those things you should share before marriage."

'Ignore that, my pen leaked...'

'Our marriage is like a one-way street, and I'm behind him, honking my horn...'

"We started to communicate and found out we had nothing in common!"

'It's another special interest call senator - your wife!'