Marmaduke Fan Pillows

"Oh, look. Here comes the winner of the miniature Marmaduke look-alike contest!"

'This means war!'

'You can either take my 'NO' for an answer, or. . .'

'Why do they call it walking the dog?'

'The news has started a MarmWatch segment as a public service.'

Koala

"Remember back in the day when I was a real heartbreaker?" "Riiight... now the only thing you break is wind."

Missing You.

'I'm re-enacting a battle with my conscience.'

S.P.F. 1,000

"Kid!! We know you're in there!!! Either come out or commence to fightin'!!!!"

"He was a grouch when I met him. It was love at first gripe."

Newborn bird sees tortoise and starts wearing shell.

'Talking of of big tops have you seen the new barmaid at the Green Dragon?'

'Whoops. There goes one of my prostheses.'

'I hate it when he has friends around'.

"Have you heard of Murphy's Law 2.0? It's anything that could possibly go wrong often does...as well as a thing or two that couldn't possibly go wrong."

Yeah, the commute is killing me too: I live a full kilometre away...

'How's the egg?' '.Turtle crawls out'

"Remember - you have sharp teeth and claws, but he has sarcasm."

"Is there a humorist in the house?"

"O.K., your mouth may be clean but I'll bet your mind is filthy."

Possum bungee jumping from branch with bungee tail.

'Well, so far the only ones to answer our fondue party invitation are the rats in our basement.'

Um... Can I get an 'L', Pat?

'Nobody goes there any more.' - 'It's too crowded.'

"In my opinion, the best invention was the TV-remote: It used to take me ages to change channel when I had to walk from the couch to the TV..."

'Don't worry. I've got your back.'

"Cheese fondue has gone wherever crepes Suzette and tuna Mornay went."

"I'll bring her home tomorrow, after the slumber party!"

'Where it asks, 'head of household'. . . who is it. . . you or Marmaduke?'

"So the knight married the damsel and they lived not-unhappily ever-after, though the knight regretted not having slain a few more dragons in his prime."

'First, you've got to learn to slow down...'

Kangaroo - Son, it's time you moved out.

Bad Bread