Marmaduke Admirer Pillows

'Turn off that electric can opener before Marmaduke tears down our kitchen door!'

'Marm! What did I tell you? No more sleepovers!'

'Where it asks, 'head of household'. . . who is it. . . you or Marmaduke?'

Bad hair day!

Man retrives a mermaid from his swimming trunks after a swim in the sea

"Hic. Gosh and begorrah!" "Wha?"

'I admire your floatibility.'

Giant ape juggling planes and captive.

Greenfingers.

'Say baby - 'come live with me and be my love, and we will all the pleasures prove, that valleys, groves, hills and fields,woods or steepy mountain yields' - Marlowe.'

battered artist has painted picture of falling bomb.

' It's a bit of an anti climax - I've washed it but I can't go any where ! '

'I'm looking for something to impress the shareholders.'

Mermaid Art

'The cool thing about being a kangaroo is that I can actually watch my baby grow...'

Curling your hair for no reason

'Done the first, now shower, shave.' - The bear essentials.

The Epsom Derby - Bookies

We micro-grafted all the hairs from the back of your head to the top and now we've completely covered your bald spot.'

Victorian Gentleman

"Hop in Joey, it's bath time."

"Thrilling news, sweetie! The National Gallery's entire collection of Velázquez is now attributed to you."

'Apparently it's part of the evolutionary process!'

'I'm telling you Dad: Walking upright and using tools is the way of the future...'

Knight sees sign near castle: 'Prince's Parking, All Others Will Be Toad.'

Sheep are sheared and then shown a mirror.

'I'm sure it's a violation, but I can't find it in the rule book.'

"No, son. Let him finish."

Lady vampire putting lipstick on in a mirror with no reflection

"We really need to put some more mirrors in here."

". . . so a duck walks into a . . ."

'We could make a fortune teaching Parkour you know...'

Way too much anthropomorphising

"Things get more interesting at noon."

'Now that's what I call a beautiful fit.'