Market Whisperer Gifts

"I'm getting subtle hints of what the Fed might do."

Harry, I've just had a tip!

'I'm trading futures in green sheets.'

Opening the door to new customers

"Retail shares just went up ten percent. My wife must have gone shopping this morning!"

Bullish, I Guess.

'Well, I'm not very satisfied with our customers, either.'

'It's easy, Greg. Just get in touch with your inner regional sales manager.'

"Do you swear to calm the jittery financial markets, all the jittery financial markets and nothing but the jittery financial markets, so help you God?"

'Looks like the perfect time to bring in our profit sharing scheme.'

'Now go out there and sell yourself!'

"I've spent all night diluting our negative reviews on Yelp." "Really?" "Yeah. You know how you can usually tell when a business owner does that?" "They post 'reviews' that don't have even a hint of negativity." "Amateurs. Check out the negatives I include: 'House of Java Cafe. I hate it because it's so perfect, it makes the rest of my day feel inadequate.'"

'We need to target the rich and stupid.'

"After viewing your current account balance, I think you should read the sign."

'I've been a broker for almost three days and I've never seen the market act like this.'

"He works well with everyone except customers and co-workers."

"Our brand is about talking about our brand."

we wanted to get rid of all the 'superbugs' but they were the only one's who understood the new it system

'Then again - no pain, no gain.'

'Stocks fell on the perception that stocks would fall on the perception that stocks were falling.'

"It's important to see 'beyond the obvious' when you look at a customer. . ."

'We're projecting a profit, but not within our lifetimes.'

'Mom, Dad, it's nice of you to visit me at the store, but you know, I am working.'

'I see you have a stock market/body connection.'

Ukraine War Clouds

"Don't worry Sir, you're not the first person to ask for a refund and you probably won't be the last!"

'Are you hiding something from me?'

'Boy, are the markets getting sensitive, anymore.'

"You say there's a dip in the market?"

"That last customer thinks I should fire you."

'Stay on all fours. That way you can pounce on new consumer wants.'

This is Mr Smith from Big Data Mining. He says he's found an insight.

'Excellent! Our tests confirm that the average shareholder falls asleep by page 9 of the 10-K. Place the notice of the IRS audit on page 10.'

"I can't keep giving you stock tips. The SEC has been making 'insider trading' inquiries."

'A few rules for new investors: First never say 'kaching' until the market is up...'