Maritime Disaster Enthusiast Pillows

'Petersen, you're fired!'

'A team meeting in 20 minutes seems appropriate.'

Cutaway view of Ocean liner.

Viking on beach with rubber ring shaped like viking ship.

"This cruise is getting a very stern review from me, I can tell you."

'Heavy seas tonight, Mom...'

"Tell them we only have romaine!"

Captain steering house through flood.

'Well, it wasn't my lucky day... first there was that shark and then I bimped into a bunch of beaver!'

Santa Claus You Are Welcome.

'Looks like a good day fah haulin' lobstah, eh, Pauley?...Let's just say it became a good day fah drinkin'...'

Lighthouse Beam.

'You'll find there's no middle ground with Kirk Knoland.'

"Entweder Fisch oder Fleisch"

'That strange smell, George.. is FRESH AIR!'

'Just in case there is an accident.'

Ship upsidedown in a bottle has rescue boat in bottle next to it.

'...the storm raged and the doctor got drunk to steady his nerves..'

'Clem,the doctor told you to get away and relax.'

"He's a keeper!"

"Can I interest you in a great white?"

It became increasingly difficult for the captain to reward his crew and still maintain his ferocious reputation.

'So, what do you want to talk about?'

'Of course I brought the emergency flares.'

'Well for crying out loud, why didn't you do that when I asked you?!!'

Set sail

'Captain, there's someone pissing in the hold!'

'Honey, did you bring the anti-nausea pills?'

"No, I said to swab the deck!"

Rats deserting a sinking ship

Ever Given

"Someone switched off the freezer...it's melted."

"Look lively crew, lest we be dashed upon these scrumptious shores."

"Call me Ishmael."

Pirate captain: 'I'm so embarrassed! I walked around all day with my swash unbuckled!'