Manuscript Collecting Gifts

"Drop everything, Dominic. I need you to proof this for blasphemy."

"Bah, I could've written a better dénouement in my sleep."

Gramophone dreams of mp3 player.

"Oh great, the printer is down."

"It's about the murder of an editor who refuses to publish a writer's work..."

"For just one monkey in front of one typewriter you've come up with some amazing stuff."

'Fyodor Dostoevsky sends weeks describing Alexy Karamazov's quest for a white whale, and then discards the entire chapter."

Large print rock'n'roll section

"Moby Richard by Herman Melville" "Wonderful! Not sure about the title—let's discuss editor."

"By God, for a minute there it suddenly all made sense!"

'You can't reject my manuscript without due process!'

'Thank god for the spellchecker!'

"There's the pressure from my public, naturally, as well as the pressure from my publisher, my agent, and all that. But the real pressure comes from that devil inside that makes me different from other men, that makes me a writer. But, of course, you know all about pressure, grinding out those papers at Sarah Lawrence."

Publisher to writer: 'It was a great read, except I collided with run-on sentences, tripped over broken English and got knocked about by a dangling participle.'

Groovy Baby

"We do not usually acknowledge unsolicited manuscripts, but we want you to know that we tore yours into tiny pieces. Yours sincerely, The Op-Ed Page."

"Do you have anything by The Damned."

"Yes, we still love print, don't we?"

Even cowgirls get the blues. 'Well, howdy! I've been lookin' for this here B.B. King album forever!'

'As is the fashion these days, it's about nothing.'

"I just want to say thanks for getting me into this writing group."

Record department with rock, crossover and classical sections.

"Here it is - my novel. I'll be interested to hear your compliments."

'Your book has a wonderful, timely quality. We're putting it on our list for a 2009 release.'

'It's not enough that you want to publish it, you must beg for it.'

Astronaut startled by post delivered to spaceship.

Reading the love-letter

"It needs a lot of editing."

Early Literary Letters - Philip Larkin.

Are you printing your own book? No, it's my mailing to agents!

"For goodness sake brother. Haven't you finished that note to the milkman yet?"

'Your book will definitely be a best seller; it just needs a complete new set of words.'

Constitution of the United States (First Draft)