Mannerism Maverick T-Shirts

"No, no, no! It's one thing to throw your own faeces, but you're not allowed to throw anyone else's!"

"Do you guys serve beer?"

Employee won't think about work outside of box

"Delegating authority is good. Delegating blame is better."

'So, gentlemen, how's the dollar trading against the immortal soul, today?'

'You have no idea how hard I've gotta work just to maintain my indie cred around here!'

'I'm not motivated by profit, Henderson - I'm motivated by excessive profit.'

"The only good news this year, gentlemen, is our massive bonuses."

Gene Therapy

I'm tired of your games, Al. MY games? look who's talking! The guy with the role-playing hand puppets!

'Please join me now in a group meditation.'

'We're not interested in loyalty,but we do value obedience.'

Psychiatry. Ordinary therapeutic techniques have been unsuccessful, but I have a crazy idea that just might work!

'Knock it off. That's just the kind of backward thinking I was talking about.'

"He's right, but he didn't have to rub our faces in it."

"Stan, this looks like a breakthrough!"

"What do you mean, 'There can be no ethics without fear of God'?! Look at me - all ethical and shit!"

Colin had finished the 'One Minute Manager' and was now practising the 3467 minute tea break.

' I used to lead by example but it was too much work.'

Karl Marx

'When are you going to show some INITIATIVE, Findley?', 'When you TELL me to, sir!'

'Don't just sit there, hire someone who agrees with me.'

'The ethics consultant said our business conduct is immoral. I immediately took action and fired the guy.'

"Don't try to understand them, just ride and rope and brand them."

I understand you all have names already, but if I want to assign my employees names I like, Margeret, I'll damn well go ahead and do it!

'Take a deep breath and don't panic - we're walking by the reason this area's known as the 'Fear Factor'!'

'Managing a team in the current climate requires new skills...'

"Don't feel bad. Shallow people make my job easy."

'Darn! - Don't you hate it when you forget what you were meditating about?'

"You're wrong! I'm not the worst boss you've ever had. I'm the worst former boss you've ever had."

'You know you're 40 when...'

'What if, and I know this sounds kooky, we communicated with the employees.'

'A sure-win radio talk show. People phone in with questions on existence and reality, and you respond with total silence.'

Conformity

"I heard there's something big coming down from top management."