Manifestation Gifts

"I've decided I'm going to be positive all the time."

"You're losing the audience. Switch to the Powerpoint presentation."

'Don't feel bad — all tree huggers get a splinter now and then.'

Early Piety

"Peterson proposes we move out of the mountains."

"It's not face paint. I'm transitioning into a snow leopard."

The Government's Got Your Back. And Wants Your Front As Well.

"That was totally....what's the word I'm looking for?"

Blue sky thinking

'Fischer Says Give Thanks to the Lord!'

Save the whales. . . Save the pandas. . . Save the planet.

"I brought cocoa."

"Using worst case scenario as a baseline, I consider this data quite encouraging."

'St. Joseph's Church,today's sermon, the road to heaven (free maps)'

"Enough about the forest, why don't you show us more trees?"

'There's something I never told you about your father, Billy. He was a lawyer.'

I'm not sure they understood what I was getting at. Yeah, they all looked confused, didn't they?

The Day Dreamer.

'I'm just going to say my prayers. Any requests?'

'I think I've now earned the right to wear God on my sleeve.'

'Do you know what I miss? - Chalk talks!'

Je Suis Charlie

S**t Threw a Goose

'Do you want your pie-chart with everything?'

"Well of COURSE it's mostly gobble-dee-gook! Were you expecting something different?"

'Pop-up Bible.'

"Look, someone tattooed that building!"

"At least we've got a nice day for it..!"

a crash-test dummy is performing some affirmations before going to work

Quiet Quitting

"I've tried to keep one in the past, but it always flew away when my husband came home. So I thought I'd try this method!"

When the traditional and contemporary services overlap.

'It helps with reception.'

'I am not my job... my job is not me... I do not need my job to give my life a purpose...' 'Hey, did you hear the news? We're all laid off!' 'Stupid affirmations!'

Female Boss 6