Malt Master T-Shirts

"Try this new IPA I just finished. Let me know if the malts and hops are layered like last week's batch." "Bailey was a really 'good boy'."

'Don't worry. It's never too hot or never too cold.'

'You call it a bra. I call it excess packaging.'

'Still not ready to talk? Ok dip him again.'

"He's such a fussy eater."

Mother puts extra long dummy in babies mouth.

A Tit for Tat.

Pull the udder one

'Cracked nipple? But I didn't even drop you.'

"I'm unable to process this image."

"I bet you can't name one person who makes a better lengua casserole than me!"

On Sale Today Free Range Chickens...Back In One Hour.

Pig and chicken asking for milk from cow, who replies: 'Sorry, I already gave at the office.'

Timmy Works with His Pet Cow

'There are shortcuts to making home brew, but taking a swig of malt extract and letting it ferment in your mouth isn't one of them.'

"This dinner party's going to a take a but of work."

The Gong

'Why do my parents have to be professional chefs?!'

'You followed the recipie but it's missing the secret ingredient: Mom.'

'Are you trying to tell me that neither of you get penalty rates for the 2 a.m feed?'

Garden Centre: Bonsai trolleys.

"Wait. Let it breathe."

"It turs out my milk is actually aging cream...so, I use it to remove all those ugly age spots."

"I have a strong personal commitment to dinner."

"Yes, I'm the Cowardly Lion, and I want a double shot of single malt courage for the Yellow Brick Road."

'How damp is this place? Let me put it this way: I use mold and mildew remover as a skin care product.'

"Another round of Shirley Temples."

"Those aren't three-star-restaurant pants."

"I'm prescribing your husband a double dose of malt whiskey, to be taken twice every evening."

Bach Doubles

"Didn't I say to just sprinkle salt on it!"

Cloud Cuckoo Land, "Martha, I've just discovered where Uncle George has gotten to"

'If he says 'got milk', I'm gonna bite.

Survival of the Foodiest

Higher milk production