Makeup Mavens Gifts

I'm sorry Keith but the last thing I want to do right now is KISS and make up!

Makeup! Makeup! Makeup!

"My secretary just made me aware of the necessity of investing in the beauty industry."

"Your mascara is running."

Men find this shampoo irresistible. It's called 'Gee, Your Hair Smells Like A New Car'.

The adoration of the gels.

"Can you make wishes on fake eyelashes?"

'Be ready in a minute - just have to put on my face.'

'Have you no common scents?!'

'I ask her to make up her mind. So she powders her forehead.'

"I don't like your application."

One of the Ten Best Hair Days of the Year

'I'm an atheist!'

Only then, did Medusa realise her mistake.

"Where are my eyelashes?"

"Hi,Honey - I'm Homeboy."

'Don't all look at me like that! What did you expect the face pack to do for me?'

"I prefer 'prostitute'. 'Media whore' implies that I'm not getting paid."

"We're having a make up test at school. Can I borrow your mascara?"

"An appointment? Let's see... She could fit you in before breakfast TV, or after lunch on Radio Two, or between Radio Four afternoon and the Drive Home SHow..."

"Yikes! So many foundations, so little time."

'You're on Deck! Wilson! Hurry up with that pedicure!'

"C'mon already...that lipstick really isn't my shade."

'No-one buys these stylish frames for their eyes, usually it's for their Facebook photo's.'

"Accepting for..."

Ralph Stanley

"I love 'bitch's night out'."

"Believe me, you never looked better since you fell into that vast of skin cream."

"It isn't fair! Why aren't thin lips fashionable?"

SELECTIONS FROM THE "VICTOR'S SECRET" CATALOGUE

'This is the kind of hat you wear to bed.'

"She leaked WHAT to the press?"

Tuba Player Stores a Barrel of Beer

"We're running a little late. The Mrs. is still putting on her face."

"Now, open your cosmetics fridge and delicately apply the cold hard cash to the area around your eyes."