Makeup Artist With A Sense Of Humor Pillows

Texas Chainsaw Mascara

'He really wanted to get into the zombie role, so he became a Meth-Head actor.'

"I groom all day and still look like a baboon."

"I kid you not, blood was oozing from the walls! Unfortunately, it was fake: I had stumbled on the set of a horror movie..."

'Look - a starfish, its manager, its agent, its minders, its significant other, its make-up artist, its personal trainer, its secretary, its astrologer, its feng shui consultant...'

"Can you make wishes on fake eyelashes?"

Life Store Guide: Make-up and jewellery

"Whoa. Jeff. Looks like you got that job at the cosmetic testing lab."

For heavens sake,put some make-up on!

'I ask her to make up her mind. So she powders her forehead.'

'You're much better than my mom. You can hardly tell when she paints her face.'

"Pssst! I had some CGI done."

"I feel bad for the companies that make lipstick."

Only then, did Medusa realise her mistake.

"Who's a pretty girl now?"

"Damn. These must have shrunk in the wash." "I don't think so."

'I know I don't look like a matinee idol of yesteryear anymore, but neither do they!'

Woman applying makeup

Alien Beauty Magazine

'You can come out, Marmaduke. I was just kidding about putting lipstick on you.'

'The Prom Dress: One Week Later'

"I'm not trying to be beautiful, I'm only trying to look better than everyone else there."

"We're having a make up test at school. Can I borrow your mascara?"

So, Leo catches me, devours me...wears make up?"

"More concealer?"

'There's no charge for the carrier bag!'

"I could afford a degree in broadcast journalism, but not the makeup."

Complete Makeover

Television guests' essentials in November.

"Do you have anything that can help remove dark circles from under my eyes?"

The girl who has everything...

'Is my make-up O.K.?'

'You are in court today, so I've got to take you into make up.'

Don't hate me becasue I'm beautiful.