Major League Follower Pillows

"Is that one of your wood dodging balls?"

What McWit lacks in speed he gains in nose.

No Baseball

Vendor selling testosterone.

Don't touch that dial! — We're experts, and we know what you should be watching!

'The manager takes the pitcher out of the game'

Ahhh, spring baseball.

"i'm not surprised to find this. You can fit a pickleball court anywhere."

'Watch out for the hidden ball trick.'

"I swear, if he says, ‘Oh, American football’ even once, we’re gonna Brexit."

MLB Owners, Players, Fans

'A good, but not a grand slam!'

"Did you watch the super bowl?"

Therapist wearing a Yankees' cap talks with an upset patient wearing a Mets cap.

"Your fastball is just hanging and your curve isn't breaking at all. What you should do is take an analgesic with some pain-relieving anti-inflammatory ingredients for a few days."

Leo Tolstoy tries the sports market

The Five Major Rule Changes in Major League Baseball.

'I think maybe they should move opening day until it's warmer.'

'I warned them. I said, if you allow one fan to scatter the ashes of loved ones, it's just going to open the floodgates.'

'Keep your eye on the ball, Jake! Level swing! Rotate your hips! ... and ease up on the sunflower seeds!'

'I'm sorry...Commissioner who?'

'Hi Hon, just calling to let you know I'm on my way home.'

The Geeks of Summer

Let the game begin.

"Sex, drugs and sports. Didn't it used to be sex, drugs and rock and roll?"

'Wait! We only intervene if both benches empty. If it's one team brawling, we normally just let them duke it out.'

'Strike!'

Tokyo 2020 - No Audiences

The Yankees smashed,clobbered, crushed, subjugated, whacked, humbled, shellacked, smeared Seattle, or was it the other way around?'

Pau Gasol

'My husband isn't home, but he thinks whatever Andy Rooney thinks.'

Olympics Ban

'I can't decide.'

'Sorry, Pennington. You don't have your stuff today. I'm pulling the plug.'