Major League Buff Gifts

What McWit lacks in speed he gains in nose.

Monster Baseball. The team's continuing to have some problems this season. Jekyll is good one day and bad the next. Dracula only shows up for night games. The Mummy is always covered in bandages and on the injured list. And King Kong can't keep his mind on the game --- Whenever he sees a pretty woman, he climbs up into the stands after her! At least Frankenstein has been pitching great again, just like when he was young! Yeah, he has a completely new arm!

Mr. Metamorphosis: "At least this better than waking up as a cockroach."

Bowled over again!

Golfing Boss

'I'm not abandoned. I'm a free agent.'

"I don't believe I've missed a single sign since you made the switch to Power Point."

"I never knew God was such a sports fan."

Race track - with the race being to apply the white lines between lanes

Venn Diagram: DIamonds

"Damn those dugout Martinis!"

Bobby's pitching coach told him to put some stank on the ball.

'Does sports trivia count as something I learned today?'

'It's baseball season!'

The Other Cooperstown

"All of a dither as per usual!"

Dialogue about the relationship.

Baseball Fantasy League Draft. 27 Trout. Everybody wants that rare player who can do it all on their team. Yeah, a player that hits for average and hits for power! Who is also terrific with a glove and has a strong throwing arm. All along with having great speed! Excuse me, I just don't understand it. Why are you always making such a big deal over a five-tool player?!

Vendor selling testosterone.

"I thought it was a strike, Troy—but ask your mother."

'Fergie quits - chewing gum sales hit all time low!'

But does he dust anything at our home? Noooo

"All right! Have it your own way. It was a ball."

Frank & Ernie's Health and Fitness Equipment for Elite Athletes. Our first delivery is there free weights we're taking to a golfer. He'll be working on his irons! This is going to a swimmer. A massage table for back strokes! A pro snowboarder bought this hyperbaric chamber. He wants to get big air! And we'll finish by taking the treadmill to a baseball player's basement gym. Of course ... for the home runs!

'Will that be coach?'

It was the bottom of the fifth and the bases were loaded.

"Dear, there's someone here to collect your soul."

"It was your father's idea - He can't bear to miss a second of the game."

Kick! Go for it!

'Steeee-rike three!'

-I think I've caught a cold -It's the only thing you've caught all day!

"Did Yogi Berra ever say anything besides 'It ain't over till it's over'?"

'Just putt the dang ball, already!'

Arch of Triumph Save

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