Mail Mystery Solver T-Shirts

"The universe will either continue expanding at its present rate, expand at a slower rate, or begin to contract. None of this, however, can explain why it sometimes takes four days to get a letter from Chicago."

'I remember when you used to look for answers using your astute powers of deduction.'

Barks in code.

"I think I may have stumbled on something, Walpole."

"Talk, Wallace - where'd you hide the loot?"

'Trust me, there's nobody to rescue that way...'

A boy acting suspiciously

"The note in the bottle said someone's stranded here, but where is he?"

A Vase has fallen on a cat's head. Are mice to blame?

Murder in Apartment 6-K

'We subpoenaed all of 'Mr. Big's' electronic messages. They're in morse code.'

"You're lucky someone was nice enough to turn it in."

I sometimes feel spotted, but I never really feel seen.

"Unfortunately, there's no cure—there's not even a race for a cure."

"Here...let me call an expert...someone who knows about these things."

'No, you can't use your last wish, to wish for another three wishes!'

'I'm sure that the autopsy will confirm it was a suicide.'

I understand that our cat Magus died. I miss her a lot. But I wish my parents wouldn't tiptoe around it. House of Java.net Cybercafe. You don't have to watch Youtube clips of CSI: Miami to understand that death is a part of life. The thing I don't understand about our cat's death is, who would've killed her and left a mountain of unresolved clues that only a crack forensics team can figure out? Where were you at 8:45 p.m.? The Youtube Generation grows up fast.

"This just in: one of us always tells lies; the other always tells the truth. Who's who? Stay tuned."

"You know the stories about putting a pair of socks into the washing machine and getting out just one of them...Jones, it seems that we found the hideaway of the second socks!"

"According to the map, the treasure should be right behind that door."

"It's interpret-your-own-test-results day today."

"True crime meets reality TV"

'And I love the part when he finds out that it was his brother all along!'

"So that's where all the socks ended up!"

'Time machine materialises in Westminster Lord Lucan arrested'

"So, just to be clear: the 'voices inside your head' told you to launder the money from forfeited law enforcement seizures in exchange for federal tax breaks for your Uncle Mark in Costa Rica?"

Marriage a la Mode - Death of the Earl.

Man browsing books see couple kissing in romance section of book store.

"Of course, it may be one of those sting operations!"

'It was part way through the initial investigation that detective Walters felt as if he was being watched, but there was no one in the room. No one that is except the cat, who sat contently on the chair and watched him with an almost human repose.'

Apothecary. Tell us what ails you. We'll concoct a chemical mix to dissolve in water which will fix you. Every problem has solution!

"Odd, since neither of us overfeeds her by even the smallest amount."

'I can't read their smoke signal. It's encrypted.'

"I'm sorry, JB, we still haven't worked out how we did it."