Mail Magician Gifts

'Bills, Bills, Bills!'

'How fast can you hype?'

"After years of cartoon rejections, Bill stooped to trying a little shameless product placement."

"Gimme a large cheeseburger, regular fries and a diet root beer!"

Businessman with in and out boxes marked: 'Hocus' and 'Pocus'

If Disney was a software company

Smoke and mirrors.

Santa called but you were out!

"Mail's here."

Trump Destroying U.S. the Postal Service

'This wasn't what I meant by viral marketing...but if you can get it to work.'

Alien flies in a spaceship out of a postbox.

"I dreamt we got a 'sorry you were out' card."

Inkwell Genie.

"My scoop-back tank comes in Mango, Morning Glory, and Scallion. Don's Maori surfers are available in Iris, Mustard, and Prawn."

"I've got a great idea! By adding the words "and associates" to my business name, no one will every suspect I'm really just one person with a phone and a web site working out of my bedroom!"

"We can succeed if our target audience is not made up of rational human beings."

The marketing is out there now. People all know the pizzas are prepared on the premises. So why no customers?

"And when conventional theories don't work, we've got Charnier here to do us a spot of voodoo marketing."

Mice taking lessons.

"Prospectus in not spelt P...R...O...A...G...A...N...D...A."

Postman Drops Off Post In Medical Building.

'The good news is consumer confidence is up. And the REALLY good news is consumer gullibility is Way up.'

Go on! Pick a card.

'They decided to immure the ladrone in a drogue.'

'Here's the junk mail.'

'But what do you sell?'

The writer's world

'It's the philosophy of the company that truth in advertising begins at home.'

'This potion will get you promoted but I can't guarantee a bonus.'

'Unethical advertising uses falsehoods to deceive the public. Ethical advertising uses the truth to deceive the public.'

"Love's OK, but there's no money in it. For the right price, I could help people fall in love with your products."

'My nephew Richie can download all your work from the internet for free. You are all fired.'

'A late payment and a friendly reminder cross paths in the mail.'

Free and Open Source Software.