Magic Show Fan Pillows

"Is there a doctor in the house, and more importantly, another magician?"

Worm Magician

'I'm sorry, folks, Hoodino is unable to perform. He can't get out of his jeans.'

'That's a good trick. Can you make jobs reappear?'

Why Magicians don't put wives in their act

Toadstools

'One eye of newt or two?'

Harry Potter learns some 'new tricks' on his first day enrolled in a public school.

Desert Island BBQ

'They all laughed when I told them that I was going to marry a magician.'

"Hey! Where's that black cat? My ride's ready!"

'Good news - basic black is being shown this season.'

Late BroomStick

You do know it's Harry Potter who's real and JK Rowling is just one of his spells?

"I can't believe he brought her."

"I said slime."

"And now, for your entertainment, I will drink a glass of water while Rempert, here, remains eerily silent."

Rocking Witches.

"What the hell took so long?"

100% carbon neutral

"Oh, sorry - Open Sesame, PLEASE."

Broomstick crash.

'The cutbacks begin to affect wizards.'

Kiddies Menu for Witches

"Then, after college, I joined the navy. Wait, I think I hear him coming."

"It's probably just seasonal."

"But until I do transmute lead into gold, maybe I could interest you in some lovely lead jewelry."

"I just need help getting the pit out."

Rocket and Witch Race

What Harper Lee's REALLY been up to all these years

"Go figure: nobody wanted to kiss me when I was an ugly prince, but now, somehow, pretty girls are lining up!"

'See how the fools flee when fantasy role-play is fantasy no longer!'

Witch's Brew.

I tried working with Houdini, but he wanted me to escape from a straight-jacket before jumping out of the hat...

Juggler and Illusionist