Made Redundant Pillows

"We're very sorry, Templeton."

"This is not permanent...we'll be back as soon as things start to look up."

"At this office no two days are different."

"Yeah, I don't like this part either."

'You can't fire me! -- This is a right-to-work state!'

"We're all in the same boat, except it's more like a life raft than an actual boat."

'Howard's doing things he's always wanted to with his redundancy money.'

"I'm sick of watching the same movie every day."

"Your job is to build an app that replaces you."

St. Elmo's fired.

"Here's your hourly job performance review."

'Think' 'But not too much'

"Life isn't fair, and that's what makes it fun."

"I'm feeling adventurous today, Penny – let's tack on a block."

'The good news is we're not laying you off. The bad news is we want you to take a 20-year lunch break without pay.'

'I'm fired, am I -- What's that supposed to mean?'

Daily Routine

"Hey, at least you got a severance package."

'We'll add extra to your severance package if you promise to go to work for our competition.'

"Come out, Snivers, it's a decent enough redundancy package."

'I interview well, but only for exit interviews.'

"At last! They've begun downsizing the top level."

Tweed makes a Mockery of the Supreme Court

"He told me I was a flip phone expected to do a smart phone job."

"At least you didn't get the axe."

'We're keeping Edwards because he forwards the funnier e-mails.'

Department of Wastage - Formerly 'Middle Management'

"Don't bother replying. That's YOUR job being advertised."

'And this is where daddy goes through the motions.'

"I have some character-building news for you."

'Reed oil aboot tit!'

"Being a CEO is a bit like being a football manager. . ."

"No wonder it was so affordable."

'I need a vacation, Ms. Sims. I'm tired of the same old things day after day.'

Take Harris up in the company helicopter and throw him out.