Redundancy Pillows

"When times are tough we all have to make sacrifices...and you're ours."

"This is not permanent...we'll be back as soon as things start to look up."

'Do you prefer rosy rhetoric or the plain truth that I'm firing you?'

'We're keeping Edwards because he forwards the funnier e-mails.'

'Not another collection.' - 'It's for you. You've been made redundant.'

'I hear Jenkins is going after your job...'

'There's a big, wide, wonderful world of opportunity out there, Figgins, and I can't bear to keep you from it for another minute.'

'We'll add extra to your severance package if you promise to go to work for our competition.'

"Item 1 - party hats will be worn to all meetings to bring a sense of fun and frivolity to proceedings. Item 2 - you're all fired."

I'm sorry son, but we're going to have to let you go...I want you off the premises by lunchtime...meawhile, keep up the good work!

'Simkins, you're fired!'

'Sorry, I have to let you go!'

'I interview well, but only for exit interviews.'

'Er...no...I'm sorry...I couldn't...I'd feel silly donating to Johnson's farewell gift after firing him.'

'Your plants can stay, but you have to go.'

'You are a credit to the human race, Yardsley. Unfortunately, you're a liability to this firm.'

'I've just become self-unemployed.'

Cats Always Land on Their Feet, "So I got this great job the day after we were made redundant"

'The company's restructuring a bit folks, more efficient, more streamlines...so, sorry Phil, we're letting you go.'

Slow Recovery for Unemployed.

"Why don't you lazybone get up and find yourself a job?? Oh, I forgot....you're one of the guys I fired last month..."

"Don't bother replying. That's YOUR job being advertised."

"Byrnes, I'm replacing you with a court ordered community service person."

"You have two options for leaving the firm, either pursue other options or go in another direction..."

"Regarding your status, let's just say the economy is no longer at full employment."

"We're all in the same boat, except it's more like a life raft than an actual boat."

"I'm afraid you're being defunded."

"Trevor, you've been an asset to the company for the past ten years, but it's time for a fresh face..."

Job disparity getting worse.

"Life isn't fair, and that's what makes it fun."

"Now that I've been let go, the commute is all I have."

"Our operations here close down today, and you are all emeritus!"

"I have some character-building news for you."

"Dead man walking!"

Firing by Heather