Macho Banterer Pillows

Department of Who's Your Daddy?

'Crushing empty beer cans is for wimps.'

"Of course I know how to use a chainsaw!"

Man posing on beach as women ignore him.

Men can show their emotions!

'Put your tools away. We can't afford to pay any more tradesmen to fix another of your botched DIY projects.'

Important Muscles.

Geezer.

Soldiers' Ego

"This is all my own hair."

"Science has proven that if you don't know what you're talking about, people will still take you seriously if you act like you do...Especially if you back it up by saying 'Science has proven' it."

"Wanna come over and watch the big game?....I was actually talking about the new 'Pac-Man vs. Superman' X-box game."

"Football and hunting - what more could you ask for?"

'I looked into their eyes before I shot them, with my high-powered rifle, from half a mile away.'

"If he'd done that to me, I'd have got up and given him a good thump!"

Man with many tattoos.

'He eats his yogurt and carrot sticks out of a grease-stained brown bag to preserve his macho image.'

"Come on. One more. You got it..." "It's so cute when they do that."

"There's one telltale sign a man is interested in you....He weeps when you mercilessly mock him and all that he holds dear....It also weeds out the 'men' who are afraid to cry."

'John's hiding. I expect His wife gave him quiche again for lunch.'

'That's a good start, Betsy, but could you make it more macho?'

Arm and leg wrestling.

"Your old boyfriend came by. He wants to patch things up."

'My speed limit is bigger than yours.'

"I recommend the lobster today, sir, if you think you're man enough."

Macho Males: Putin and Obama

Soft answer that turneth away wrath bar and grill...formerly, Salty's

The Men Thing. . .

'I like a man with a good, firm fist bump.'

'Bad hairy-chest day.'

'Oh yeah? Step outside and say that!'

'I told you it was a full bodied wine, but you just had to mess with it.'

'In my experience, two types of men order pink squirrels. First, there's the guy who's secure enough about his masculinity that he doesn't care what people think. And then there's the guy like you...'

'I like my guys tough, you know, the kind who leave the crusts on their sandwiches.'